I was, in fact, in Salem for Halloween, but I didn't see any of this, I just find it hilarious. Actually, I don't know why I was in Salem for Halloween. I just went to a party at Zach's. I didn't sacrifice anything, I didn't even use the word "wiccan," I didn't see any haunted houses, and I wasn't there to stab anyone, so there wasn't any significance, really.
Zach was wearing a bathrobe and a tie, with no shirt. That was his costume. A pretty half-assed Halloween, in some respects. Rachael went to great lengths with her costume (a homeless woman), so to the point that her hair has yet to be de-tangled. She might consider just keeping it that way from on, now that she knows hair madness and general filth is extremely attractive to forty eight year old closet homosexuals (I'm pretty sure).
Don't even ask me to explain that. It was extremely uncomfortable for everyone involved but Zach, who cannot ever be uncomfortable. I seriously think it goes against physics.
If you're not uncomfortable in a bathrobe and a tie while your forty eight year old neighbor is hitting on your friend's friend from work at your party, I don't think too much can phase you. So kudos to Zach.
Kudos also to Dave for ranting about nothing on the porch. I don't even think I can do it justice. It went something like this:
"Hey, man, I just got out of jail. They gave me a bible to read and I didn't want to read the fuckin Bible so I just sat on it. They took it away and gave me a smaller one- Hey guys, I'm here to watch your kids, WOO! You guys got any ice cream, kids love ice cream, hey... hey you got a pool back there... cool man, can we go in the pool?"
And so on and so forth. I was right, I can't do it justice.
I'm going to end with this bit from a Salem newspaper, because it's hilarious.
Meanwhile the sun gradually set, the sky turning from pink to a dark, deep blue. "Look at the sky, suddenly it's being beautiful for us," a woman in the procession said.
The group convened in a circle around a table crowded with lit candles. A steady, slow dream beat set the mood. At one point people held hands and walked in a circle. Then they listened to prayers and clapped along to music.
"One year now ends and another begins," said a leader of the ceremony. "Blessed be," the group responded in unison.
The celebrants were from all over. Linda McRee has come from Biddeford, Maine, for the last five years. "It has a peaceful energy," she said of the ceremony.
The peace was temporarily interrupted by an onlooker who began shouting. Police arrived and took the man into custody.
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